I am a licensed elementary teacher. I have a great family, great friends-they understand most of the time. I have a great boyfriend- he is GREAT!!:)
I am not paralyzed by anxiety constantly, but it is keeping me from moving forward in my life.
I just quit a teaching job, one that I was completely qualified to do, but i COULD NOT HANDLE THE STRESS. oh my goodness. horrible.I worked there for three weeks, teaching 4th grade. I had a great class, and people around that wanted to help-did not get proper support from others on my grade level- fellow teachers will understand the situation--- so many people to help you, but not the ones that could be the BEST at helping you.
I was having panic attacks- crying, not being able to go into work, or, going into work crying- humiliating!!!!!
A teacher took me aside to her classroom, and then i went to the school counselors office- principal and her both said i could go home. I decided to go home for good. I resigned properly.
This is the SECOND time I have quit a contracted teaching position-first time was three years ago. I thought i was ready to go for it this time- this last job was closer to my fam, and I have grown up a lot since the last job. I had much success as as a sub. teacher.
But, I cannot make a living off of subbing- wish i could- I don't stress out about responsibilities that a regular teacher would have- i just get to leave.
My anxiety is keeping me from doing things that I should be doing and loving!!!
I FORCED myself to go to a choir practice at my church- i LOVE singing- going tonight gave me a HUGE migraine headache- the whole time i was there- this is a new symptom for me. havent had migraines since middle school.
i am SO HARD ON MYSELF. i never grew up with people that verbally abused me- sooo, idk why i do it to myself CONSTANTLY. like, you are failing, why do you keep messing up...negative self talk. my self confidence is low, when it should be fine. i am a smart person who is caring and who is a good person.
where do i fit into life?!! i am praying about it always
i feel like there is a huge whole in my life:(
i MUST be able to support myself financially SOOO UPSETTING that i cannot handle teaching because i love kids.