By Sister Justin Louise Stiker

My name is Sister Justin Louise Stiker, O.S.S. I am a Catholic nun of The Third Order of St. Francis, Oldenburg. I am 76 years old. I developed panic disorder with agoraphobia and depression in my early 20s, but was not diagnosed until many years later. So far, I have attended three of the ADAA's national conferences, where I purchased many helpful books and signed up for various newsletters that have all been helpful resources for me.

As a young girl I attended Holy Name School in Beech Grove, Indiana, and I received my high school education at the ICA Academy in Oldenburg, and my B.S. degree in education at Marian College, Indianapolis. I was an A+ student in grade school and high school. When I attended college, however, my condition made it difficult to concentrate and I barely passed my exams. I was tired all the time and I felt uncomfortable in crowds. I knew something was wrong with me.

After years of going from one doctor to another, in 1985 I was diagnosed with panic disorder. At last there was a name for my disorder. Doctor Wallace, who made this diagnosis, was very kind to me and tried to reassure me that I was not crazy. He gave me hope that there was help for my condition.

Doctor Wallace told me to learn all I could about the disorder so that I would not be so afraid of the physical symptoms that I was feeling. He also advised me to try to take one day at a time. He made me take a bus to go shopping and eat in a restaurant, paying for my meal and articles that I purchased. He told me to spend Saturdays walking the halls of the school where I taught so that during the school day I could take the little ones through the halls without feeling so dizzy. I could not even go to Church because I would become so dizzy that I thought I would pass out. Eventually, at 63 years of age, I moved into an apartment to learn how to live independently. Now in retirement in Oldenburg, I live in an apartment next to the Mother House and bake cakes for our Sisters' birthdays, tutor a 7-year-old girl and walk and talk to people. I started a self-help group. I try to share the latest updates on anxiety disorders with others, as well as listen and give words of support. There is hope. There are many medications and therapies that were not available years ago.

I try to live in the present moment and not worry about the future. I know that God will take care of me. I also express my true feelings and not worry about pleasing others. I have learned to say "no" when I am not able to do something. I try to be with happy people.